
Much as it pains me to say, you two are pathetic victims of Western
Civilization." As he delivers this rather discouraging verdict on the neatly
barbered heads of a pair of otherwise meek-looking golf pupils named Ken and
Kevin, Tom Shea can't resist an ironic smile beneath his monkish Graying
beard and wide-brimmed straw hat. These, together with his rumpled safari
clothes make him look a wee bit like an Old Testament prophet dressed up to
resemble an Australian bush guide.
Kevin looks baffled. "How can you tell
that from our golf swings?"
"It's perfectly obvious," replies Shea crisply.
"Ever heard of a guy called Aristotle? Well, Aristotle said, 'You are what
you do,' which for some strange reason most people in our culture have
idiotically accepted ever since.
"In effect, he argued that if you make a
mistake, you are a mistake. Is that true, Kevin? Are you a mistake simply
because you keep hitting lousy wedge shots? Of course, it's not right! In
fact, what the hell is a mistake? There is no right or wrong in golf. Lose
'right; Kevin!
"'Right' is only a shallow condition of the mind, a
ridiculous all-or-nothing model concept perpetuated by the mind-to-body
conceit! Aristotle clearly didn't get it. He was a slave to conventional
thinking, a philosophical boob! You are not what you do, Kevin. You are not
your mistakes. Golf is easy, but you're making it way too hard! The harder
you try, the worse it will get!"
Welcome to the Magical Mystery World that
is an encounter with Thomas J. Shea Jr., director of instruction at
Blackstone National, self-described "recovering" club pro and legendary
Henry-Griffitts clubfitter, "director of epistemological research" and
founder of the Golf is Easy Golf School, cosmic sojourner and purveyor of
ancient wisdoms who, depending on whom you ask, may either be a) certifiably nuts or b) on the cutting edge of golf's mental and spiritual evolution-the closest thing golf has to a real-life Shivas Irons ....